Looking for advise, or information, or I don't know,

but sympathy isn’t it.

I do have a question for those who’ve lost beloved dogs, or pets in general, how long did it take before you felt something akin to normal?

I’m very much in the grieving process now, and a part of me finds the process interesting. A different part of me is profoundly sad, another is glad that my old dog is no longer in pain or discomfort.

We have 3 other pets that I love and care for very much, but the one we just lost was something special. She claimed me as her person. Since we’ve never had kids, we’ve had dogs, then cats. Each is special in their own way, but Frieda, well she was Frieda.

Ok, I’d better stop before I make myself miserable. I was just looking for guidance, I suppose.

It took well over a year before I started feeling normal. Still occasionally feel it over a decade and a half later.

They become a part of you…and that’s OK.


It takes a while. Just remember that it’s okay to be sad and grieve. They are as much a part of the family as anyone.


We lost our golden retriever 18 months ago. It is the second dog we have lost. Both were about 12 years old at the time they died. I would say that for me, I was not consistently thinking about her after several months. When we would hike or walk in places we had been with her I would remember those happy times, sometimes with a smile and laugh and sometimes with some more strained emotions. There are a lot of goldens around where we live, both in Park City and in San Diego, and I like to think that every time I see one, it is a message from Daisy reminding me of how much she loves me.


My mom once said that once you take an animal home it’s the beginning of a long goodbye.
I agree with the others. The joy, love and affection we provide animals is returned 10-fold.
You have right to greive for as long as you need. They are indeed family.
My wife and I lost a beloved cat and we were both just so sad. After about 5 months she said “We’re too needy to not have animals to care for…” We also don’t have kids.
We now have too adorable cats and boy! do we do dote on them. Constant entertainment.


We had a mixed breed dog for 17 years. She just showed up at her house one day as a puppy and then became part of the family. Our kids were little when we got her and they grew up with her. She spent a lot of her days in our gated front yard, when she wasn’t sleeping at the foot of our bed, or just hanging out in the house with everyone. Everyone in the neighborhood knew her, and many would give her treats as they walked by. Sometimes we would run into families of complete strangers while we were walking her in the park, and one of the kids in that family would say “Oh daddy, look! It’s Whitney!“ (That was her name. I guess they learned it from the tag on her collar.) She was my running companion, and later my walking companion when I had joint issues, almost every single day. When we had to say goodbye her, the vet came to our house and I held Whitney while she passed.

I am sharing this story because that dog is still a source of happiness to our family all these years later. We talk about her often, enjoy old photos of her, and often laugh about her sweet idiosyncrasies. So in our experience, the sadness turns to shared happiness, fond memories, and joy. Maybe that will help you.

We are dog people still, and now have two of them. One is 12 and the other is 5. I walk them almost every day and they are beloved members of the family, with their own antics and quirks. Every now and then we talk about how the day will come when we have further goodbyes to say. That just makes us want to love and enjoy them all the more while we have them.

Yes, I’m a hopeless dog lover. Did I mention that we also have two cats?


I am a dog person, but have not had one since I got married as my wife is allergic.

Recently, i had to make arrangements to move my 85 year old mother (alzhimers, and a dramatic fall risk) into an assisted living center. She was ok with the move on the condition that I find a place where she could take her dog, which I happily did.

Her dog was a 15 year old cocker spaniel, in very poor health, barely able to walk, and in a lot of pain. Regardless, she was not willing to let go of him.

She was in the facility for less than a month before he bit other patrons twice and I had to make the choice to put him down. It wasn’t an option to move her back home, and not an option to move her somewhere else, as the dog was old, in pain, and constantly feeling threatened.

She still has not forgiven me.


I’m so sorry. That’s a tough, tough tough thing


So sorry.


We work with a rescue here. We run into this type of issue more often than you’d think. It’s hard all the way around. Fortunately our rescue is a no kill, so some dogs become unadoptable for various reasons, one being biting.

When we’re ready to get another dog, we’ll get a rescue.


I lost my beloved CeCe in February to old age. I lost Olivia 2 weeks ago due to the neighbor dog digging under the fence and mauling her. I don’t know when I’ll ever feel normal. My dogs are everything to me. I can absolutely relate to how you’re feeling.


Oh my God that is atrocious!
I am so sorry


That’s horrible. It is every dog owner‘s nightmare. I’m so sorry you had to go through it.


Reading this thread has helped with my grieving a bit. Thank you.


sorry for your loss


I think I’m still in the grieving process for our dog that passed away. The emotions have become less raw the farther I’m removed from that day but for me they are sill there. I’ve learned to live with them and now remember so many of the good times. It’s the new normal I guess.

We had two Siberian Huskies, a brother and a sister. The brother died just over 22 months ago. He was 10 1/2. They were inseparable. They never left each other’s side. He was the “pack leader”. As the lymphoma took him away she was right there next him always. She could sense something was wrong and would not leave his side. That was heart breaking. I still think of the night he died almost everyday.

Maybe I’m wrong but I think she still looks for him. Since he died she never leaves my side now and it makes me happy and sad at the same time. Sad that her brother isn’t here but happy that I can fill in for him.

Best of luck to you in this process. For me I’m relieved he is no longer in pain but sad he is longer here and I’m OK with that.


Thank you. Our oldest cat hung out with another of our dogs who died 4 years ago. That cat was her nurse, or comforter, or similar for the months leading up to this dog’s death. Funny, her death didn’t affect me the way this one did. We knew she didn’t have long, she had some type of cancer and was 16 years old, so we just tried to make her comfortable.

Frieda’s death was pretty sudden, she went down hill in about 2 weeks. So, we were trying to keep her comfortable, get her to eat, take her meds, etc. It became obvious the night before we euthanized her that it was her time. We tried, but what made it obvious was her not doing her normal things, not eating, not drinking, only sleeping. We gave her subcutaneous liquids to at least try to keep her hydrated. Sadly that became the only water she got the last 2 days of her life. I still feel like we waited a few days too long. Mrs. CCU would argue otherwise, but regardless, my old friend is gone. I still tear up, and sometimes cry over my dog. But I’m also starting think of her and smile instead of get emotional. It’s going to be awhile, but I can feel the beginnings inside of me.

I hope you’re doing well @Running_Ute. This has been a rough time for me. I hope yours is gone, or almost gone.


I think crying when one has a legitimate urge to cry is the healthiest thing you can possibly do